First

Okay, so it went like this: we got married last October, then moved across the entire country the following February.

They say the first year is the hardest, and I'm certain that most people say that without having to live with parents or in-laws.  Or move back home or to a new part of the country.  Infact, I would say that most people don't have to do anything really that hard, except pay bills and write thank you notes and learn how to get along, in their first year of marriage.  The really big stuff, the kind of stuff that makes life hard in general, has nothing to do with just getting married at all.  It just so happened that we had a couple of really big stuff kind of things mixed in there too. 


It was a very hard year.  But, it would have been that way if we had moved in five years.  It too, was a fast year.  In a blink, I went from the girl dancing in her hotel room with her only remaining bridesmaid with a veil on her head, to someone who doesn't think twice about stating her new name. 

It went that fast.  So, maybe it wasn't that hard afterall. 

We stayed the night in Seattle on what would have been the anniversary of the day before the day before our wedding.  Just us walking the streets of Seattle, just us checking into the Westin (which seemed way bigger last year), and just us quietly celebrating a year.  Not just an anniversary of a date, but a whole year of growth, discovery, fighting, frustrations, bills, and thank you notes. 

A whole year later, I find myself saying that I wish I could do it all over again.  I know that's not true because planning a wedding is a miserable thing to do.  But, one night of having everyone we love in one room, yes, that is missed. 

I would do it over, maybe, but I really just like being married.  I like that we are one year down.  We made it, although its not like we weren't going to make it.  I like that we don't expect things to be perfect because we had that one perfect, solid day last year.  I like that we only had enough to afford one night in Seattle, and didn't exchange gifts and actually exchanged cards the day after our anniversary because we were lazy.  I like that we ate burgers and fries the night that we stayed over and watched sports documentaries on ESPN.

 I like that I am a little bit different now and so is he. 

Fireworks

Last month in Sunset magazine, Scott Aker described Fall in the Pacific Northwest: 

In the East, fall is like a really long parade from north to south. In the West, it’s like fireworks: a spectacular burst of beautiful colors over a short time.

I don't remember the colors of past Falls here.  All I can conjure is images of crisp sunny days, dead leaves underfoot, and then the realization that the rainy season has begun, signaling winter.  Missing from these memories are the vibrant colors that I'm seeing this Autumn.

We are back from the East Coast.  Ten days in Pennsylvania, where it was not quite one season or another.  I packed shorts, but the nights were bitter cold.  The weather couldn't make up its mind. 

 
We returned to literally change right before our eyes.  Not only are the leaves falling during the shortened days, but life is so completely different than it was in September.  K has a job now and with it the confidence and stability that most jobs bring. 

It was an expected accomplishment, but something that took so long to happen. 

And then, just like that, boom.  Offer accepted, life is different. 

Its a good different.  With its own share of adjustments and rearranging.

We work opposite schedules right now. 

But, there's always someone home with the dogs. 

Its nice for each of us to have personal time. 

Extra money doesn't suck either. 

All the while, I am just taken back by how quickly time flies. Soon the holidays will be upon us. After that, a new year.  At times, we are frustrated with where we are in our lives, while other times we are overwhelmed with how much we have done. 

Maybe it all comes down to how much you stop to notice.  Did I have memories of past Fall colors?  Or did I just not take the time to look?  It is but a fleeting moment here, a sudden, intense burst of oranges and yellows.  If you don't purposefully seek it out, then there is nothing to hold onto.  Things change so quickly, and don't seem to change at all I guess, if you don't really sit down and look at it all. 

So, I am back to blogging.  Back to seeking out what I want in life.  Back to recording and creating adventures.  Back to pushing myself to do better.  I think I slacked over the last two months.  My Summer List was a decent attempt at reaching out and exploring the season and surroundings.  There was always a constant thought in the back of my head, "You have not yet jumped in a lake fully clothed."  There was ample opportunity, but overall a lackluster spirit to do so.  I think it was because there was always the backup thought of  "I will do that later." 

Well, there won't be a Fall list, and you'll have to wait for Spring.  But you better believe that there will be more of an effort this Fall to do more.  Feel more. 

Its only a short season here.  Soon, the cold rain will push the leaves off of their branches and clog drain pipes.  Yes, winter is a special time too, but nothing can compare to the bounty that this season brings.  It may not be like the Fall that we've known back East, but I've always liked fireworks better than parades anyways.